burnaby t wallace

But I think this is the year that Apple can kiss my ass. For the past several years, we all have drooled over Apple products–me perhaps more than anyone. I have been thinking of this for a while…I figure now is a good time. I have to say this.

Apple Company–you suck.

For several reasons really.

Let’s see, last year I bought my iPhone only to find that it dropped $200 mere weeks later. OK…early adopter’s tax, I suppose. OK, OK. I’ll let that slip. That, after coming out with a "smartphone" with no tasks list. C’mon. And don’t get me started on the deep sunken headphone port. I am beginning to not like my iPhone. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy it’s large screen, email client, and true-web surfing, but it sucks at replacing the devices it was supposed to. Once the other companies come out with these items (like Windows Mobile 7 or Google Android), my iPhone will be simply another music player with a low-rate audio chip.

Then I remembered the whole $2.00 upgrade fee to get the 802.11n that my Macbook already had. What?! Seriously, on the PC side of the fence, this would never have been an issue.

Also, after I installed Leopard (which, by the way, sucks more than Vista–but why is Vista getting all the hate?), I couldn’t login to my account on my computer because half of my keyboard stopped working and I couldn’t apply my "strong password" anymore. What was Apple’s fix? Use an external keyboard. Seriously? SERIOUSLY? It’s a laptop–there’s a keyboard there already!

Leopard sucks. I know I mentioned it earlier, but dude. It sucks. What does it do that Tiger didn’t? Oh yeah, have bugs in the hundreds! Stop my keyboard from working. Drop support for a ton of great apps. The one app, THE ONE APP, that I was hoping would bring happiness in my PIM life on the iPhone failed to deliver. Mail.app–still no task list on my phone. Today, as I write this, I am still perturbed that a task list has not been implemented for the Apple iPhone (jailbreaking, not withstanding–yet even those tasks lists blow). Dude. my Visor PDA from the mid 90’s had it. I thought the Mail.app would somehow unlock it. Nope. So what does Tiger have that I like? Time Machine sucks. And Apple even had nearly half a decade to copy it properly from Microsoft Windows Server. So what? A see-through menu bar? Stupid.

Then, to top it all off–the news we got from this past week’s keynote. OK, the iPhone got cell phone triangulation–OK, the Apple TV is having a second chance to prove itself as a tethered iPod to the TV. But to charge $20 to iPod Touch users to get an update for their device? That’s crap. CRAP. Dude, when the new Microsoft Zune’s came out, Microsoft gave out the firmware to flash the first generation Zunes so that they did not lose any functionality. Oh–and it was FREE!

Then my wife tells me about this blogger who approached Steve Jobs this week to ask for a picture. He dismissed her with a "That’s rude" reply and had a small circle of people surrounding him snigger at her. Boo to Steve. You and your uppity entourage can kiss my ass. Not that I ever expected him to be a nice guy (at least Bill Gates gives some money to charity and seems as approachable as my college mates).

Robert Scoble got the reaction mere seconds after this and it’s published for all to see here. Think Rude.

I like Apple computers. Yes. I do. The Mac Mini introduced me to green computing. The Macbook Pro is small, fast, and neat looking. But you know what? I enjoy running Windows Vista on it more. Their machines continue to be beautiful and sexy. But much like the cheap department store, Walmart–once you have a problem with the executives, you begin to have a disdain for the rest of the organization.

2008 is going to be my year of Apple detoxing.